Rodney Diamond: An Introduction

Rodney Diamondgold is possibly my favorite creation. He's everything every man wishes he could be. Here's a video of him giving a speech at my brother's rehearsal dinner.


Most Infamous

I stood in the shadows between the pool cues and a table occupied by a lone drunk. The drunk was staring, dumbfounded at me as he had been for the better part of half an hour, but I wasn’t bothered. Everybody stared, and the drunks stared more than the rest, since they had lost every vestige of self-respect that would have caused a pang of guilt to assault them for staring at a freak like me. I’ve gotten used to the stares. It’s the overwhelming number of drunks that bothers me.
In this Godforsaken country, if you couldn’t handle the stress of working at the plant, you turned to drink. It happened to everyone after awhile. When there’s only one game in town, they make the rules, and those rules were ruthless. Twenty-four hour shifts every day of the week. Ten hours between them to sleep, or, more commonly, drink until you finally fell into some sort of unconsciousness. No breaks, no meals, no excuses. You drank to keep the sting of a worthless life from getting to you. Finally, when the drink stopped working, you would just walk outside, into the cold, and die.


PREVIEW: For My Sins: The Trials and Temptations of Mr. Pembroke E. Silverwood

 What follows here is just a preview of a full story to come in the future. Enjoy!

As he opened his eyes, Pembroke knew it was going to be a bad day from the look on the Jaguar's face. "It's strange, the thoughts that run through one's head when inches from the gaping maw of a Jaguar," he thought much later. Surprisingly, one of them was breakfast. Specifically, was there any, and could he get some before being torn to shreds by this unwelcome beast.



Joseph hung
The endless suspension
He had no weight
The arc of the world
His ship
Fast as light and faster
He called her Alice
"Down the Rabbit's hole"
Off to Wonderland they went
Alice and Joseph


Addressing the Misuse of Containment Wards During the Elder Shintok Ascension Incantation


Misuse of primary, secondary, and tertiary wards during the more complex incantations found within the Grande Magistratum, the four great books of magic bound to this world by Magus Yevgeny Solovyov, account for more than half of the dimension rupturing disasters from the last four-thousand years. In recent years, sophistication in astral reverberation mage tracking systems has allowed us to discover an alarming trend in these accidents. Fully two-thirds of these sanity shattering twists in the very fabric of reality are caused by mages less than five years out of apprenticeship. Whether the blame lies with master mages who rely too heavily on crystalline recorded projections of their netherselves to do much of the hands-on teaching to their apprentices or simply youthful exuberance in casting spells such as the Vyrstuuk Astral Folding Ceremony is beyond the scope of this paper. The focus of this paper is to merely comment to the greater arcane community about the misuse of containment wards during the Elder Shintok Ascension Incantation or other Shintok-style dimensional breaches.